Have you ever thought about WHY you are in the BDSM D/s lifestyle?
What drew you to it? Are you new to the lifestyle? Or a veteran? Is it something you can’t live without? Or just something you fancy?
I got to wondering about this for Myself over the past few days. I have been a lifestyle Domme going on 38 years. Egad, that makes me feel ancient — but in many ways, still youthful.
My ex, as many of you already know, was vanilla. He thought I was an alien from a very debaucherous world. Perhaps I am.
All I know is that I was born to lead, direct, control, and conquer. I say that with a slight smile, but mostly serious. I am a take charge, Female Led Relationship (FLR) type of gal. It’s not that I feel the need to control someone, but I admit to liking things done a particular way. I want to help My servant succeed by learning My ways, My habits, My kinks, and My, uhm, lifestyle.
For Me, it was never completely about sensual pleasures. It was more about structure, and military style operations. I like running a tight ship, and having a dedicated crew with which to do that.
Over the decades, I’ve learned that most people really like being told what to do — even if they have issues with authority figures. It frees them from having to think, guess, anticipate, or wonder what their Top wants.
When you have a map to get to your destination, it’s much easier than floundering in unknown waters.
What I also like about the lifestyle is putting my ‘stamp’ (sometimes literally) or ‘signature’ on slaves I work with. I know that they will take away that training investment, and possibly apply it to other areas of life. I want to leave others ‘better’ than I found them. And, in turn, they leave Me with memorable experiences. laughter, even aggravations… but, cherished moments. Isn’t that really what life is about? For Me, it’s not just about the journey, but truly the adventure and spontaneity of D/s.
Thanks to O/our community at DSF — I enjoy daily excitement, unknowns, and happy accidents. I cannot imagine life without it!
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